Somehow, I find myself at a fork in the road. There is some sense of deja vu, because it feels familiar, but I don’t think I have been here before. I have been to similar places, marked by similar choices, but they were not this place. They were the choices that led me here.
This is where I get to choose, maybe I have to choose. It seems simple enough. Just let go. Let go of the regrets of the past, sure, but maybe more important, let go of my notions of what I need to move forward. Quit waiting on what may or may not ever happen. Do not surrender another day, another moment to those things, but rather live in the moment I am given.
I can choose to be miserable. I certainly have every right and every reason to do so. It’s familiar ground. I know my way around pretty well. I could get comfortable in my own personal Hell. Truth be told, I have done just that, all the while telling myself I needed someone or something to pull me from it or show me the way out. Maybe I did at one time, and maybe I will again in the future, but now, I am standing here looking at the way out. All I have to do is step thru.
So, that’s where I am. I can choose to trust, and take the path that leads me out of all of this, or I can take the one that I know just loops me around to more of the same. It should be an easy choice. Well, maybe not so easy as it seems. Trust comes hard for me. On the other hand, I think God know that. He hasn’t exactly been subtle since he called me to himself, and he has blessed and rewarded me in ways that I can neither deny or overlook. Every time I doubted, but obeyed despite my doubt, he gave me a miracle.
So, I’m choosing to trust, and I am fully expecting a another miracle. I don’t know what it will look like, but if the past is any indication, it will be pretty obvious when it happens. That is an awful lot of words to say such a simple thing, but I guess I just needed to convince myself that God will take all this and do something beautiful with it.
ManWithoutAMap 